Words

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Thy sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer." - Psalm 19:14

The other day I was mindlessly scrolling through Facebook. (Please tell me this happens to you too.) One minute I'm responding to messages and the next, like Alice, I've fallen down the rabbit hole and lost the better part of an hour. This particular day though there was something that really drew me in. You know how those random, unsolicited bits pop up here and there, enticing your attention? Well, a couple grabbed mine, and the juxtaposition of the two had me too hooked to look away.

The first story was about a woman, a former child star, who, after her years on television, kind of fell off the deep end. Without going into detail, suffice it to say that her life had been left in shambles. Hoping to redeem herself, and perhaps revive her acting career, she decided to do a television interview on one of the popular talk shows of the day. Unfortunately, this particular host was known for his sarcasm and lack of tact. This poor girl was so humiliated by his cutting remarks that she ended up taking her life the very next day.

Words matter.

The second story came just a few scrolls down. I don't know if Facebook was trying to spark a reaction, or get me thinking, or what... but this surely did. This next profile was of a young woman, current day, who was terribly disfigured by a fire. She had obviously undergone multiple surgeries to try to fix the damage left in its wake, but the scars were still visible, a lasting reminder. She was getting a makeover, and as the beautician applied makeup and curled hair, this woman's story trailed over the screen.

She said her father never forgave himself for what happened to her, but she did. She didn't hold anything against him, but it was her mother, she remarked, who instilled in her a sense of purpose, who gave her the courage to look beyond her outer appearance... her mother who told her she was so much more than her scars. Thank God for mothers like this. What a gift, a life-changing gift, her mother's words of encouragement were.

Words matter.

These two stories kept playing in my head. One, so hopeful, yet ending in tragedy. One, so tragic, yet ending in hope. And... it all came down to words. Words have such incredible power, power for good... power for evil. Words have the ability either to lift up or to tear down. That children's chant, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me," is a lie.

Words matter.

There are some words, some phrases that need action to back them up, to be truly sincere. Words like, "I do," and "I love you," are given weight and substance by the actions carried out that define what that love is, what that love does, what that love in action looks like. Phrases like, "I'll be praying for you," and, "I'd love to help... whatever you need, just let me know," need the carry-through to be meaningful and helpful. These are kind words, caring words made even moreso by the actions that animate them.

The really interesting thing is that unkind words, hurtful words... have legs of their own. They really need no further action to do their damage. Maximum destruction with minimum effort.

Words matter.

Even when followed on the heels of one such remark comes an, "I'm sorry," or an, "I was only kidding," the wound remains. Hurtful remarks always leave scars. That is why we must choose our words with the utmost care. And, lest you think I myself have mastered this skill, let me assure you, I have not. I have sent plenty of barbs flying, and I so regret it, each of them... all of them. I could try to pass them off as stress-induced, or claim sleep deprivation, even momentary lapses in judgment; they would all be lies.

The most ironic thing is that we usually reserve the worst of the lot for those nearest and dearest to us, those with whom we can be most transparent... those who are most vulnerable because here is where shields aren't supposed to be needed. I know better. God expects better.

Because words matter, I want to speak "life."

I love how the Bible describes life-giving words in Proverbs 16:24. "Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones." Words also have the power to heal, to restore, to rebuild. I know the Lord redeems mispoken words. I know that God can help me, and each of us, to speak life to one another. Let us bind the wounds of the brokenhearted, and let us build one another up in love...

one kind word at a time.