Why Thursday Evenings Are My Favorite (and why they could be your favorite too!)

It all began some ten or so years ago. My son and daughter-in-law called to say they'd like to come over for a visit and discuss some things with us. When they arrived they had a bottle of wine in tow, and we knew this was going to be an evening of deep conversation.

It happened to be a Thursday. That was the inaugural evening of what would become a tradition of sorts for Tom and me. We cheekily began referring to those evenings as "Thirsty Thursday," a time of regularity set apart to visit, converse, and yes, often to enjoy a glass of wine or two in the process.

What started simply as a convenient day and time to meet became a really great night to slow the pace and reconnect before the weekend's activities of traveling to visit family or of work or projects to be done around the house. Thursday evenings were our time, and we looked forward to that slice of sacred space more and more.

Communication is such an important aspect of a healthy marriage relationship, but all too often the demands of work and life... bills to pay and errands to run whittle away at that time leaving precious little for anything but the lightest, most essential topics of discussion.

That's where establishing a "date" can be so beneficial. We both know that when Thursday rolls around and Tom gets home from work, we get to settle in for some "us" time. It might be out on the deck sitting on the porch swing, in the Adirondack chairs on the tiny front patio, or most often in the living room in the rocker and the big red chair. Where doesn't really matter. Neither does it matter if you're enjoying a glass of wine, a cup of coffee, a jar of sweet tea, or a plain old bottle of water. The only necessities are the two of you and a willingness to talk.

I tell you truthfully, this has been so game-changing for us. We never start with an agenda... we just start... and see where the evening and the conversation takes us. We light a candle, put some music on in the background, pour a glass of something or other, and settle in somewhere comfortable to begin.

We have had some really deep conversations, some with tears, and we have also had evenings full of belly laughs. We have reminisced about the years gone by and about our kids as they have grown and flown and established lives and homes of their own. We've also voiced to each other our hopes and dreams for the future; more serious topics about things we still hope to accomplish. We have confided in and confessed to one another our shortcomings and regrets. But we have also more light-heartedly discussed the ongoing dilemma (the absolutely best dilemma) of where in this little casita we're gonna put everyone overnight once our precious grandbabies grow into the teen years.

Whatever unfolds, wherever the conversations take us, we are better together for having had them.

I'm thankful for that initial visit from our kids all those years ago. It sparked an idea and gave permission to leave an evening open each week, an intentional "pause" to reflect, or dream, or laugh, or cry, or whatever comes to mind in the moment. In reality what it does best is to convey to each other, "I value you." "I'm interested in what you have to say." "I care about your feelings on this issue." "I'd love to know what you think."

You can't really put a price tag on moments like these, and they are free for the taking. The taking of a little slice of time, a candle, some music, and perhaps...

a glass of wine or two.